Showing posts with label funny stories for kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny stories for kids. Show all posts

Cute Love Quotes And Sayings

I love true cute love quotes, and I’m a woman who wants to be married for a lifetime. That traditional life is something that I want.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own joy.
One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life. That word is love.
Our love is like the wind. I can’t see it but I can feel it.
She said to him “I am afraid of falling”. He said “I have wings…
One person all by themselves is nothing. Two people together are everything.
Cute Love Quotes
Cute Love Quotes
True love doesn’t come to you it has to be inside you.
Love rules the court, the camp, the grove, and men below, and saints above: For love is heaven, and heaven is love.
Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.
Love is like a bouncy ball because if you drop it, it always comes back to you.
There are many ways to say “i love you”, but not enough words to say how much.
The way you handled the challenging situation is admiring. I’m proud of you, dear.
Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit. Love Sayings
Love isn’t about finding the perfect person, it’s about seeing an imperfect person, perfectly.
Always wear cute pyjamas to bed, you’ll never know who you will meet in your dreams.
No one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
If this is a crush, then I don’t know if I can handle the real thing if it happens.
Love is the master key that can open the gates of happiness.
Love is like smiling. It never fades and is contagious.
Anyone can be passionate. But it takes real lovers to be silly.
All that I love loses half its pleasure when you are not there.

Cute Love Quotes


Your prince will one day come. He may not ride a white horse or live in a big castle but he will love you and only you.
Some gifts are big. Others are small. But the ones that come from the heart are the best gifts of all.
Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.
The best things in life aren’t things.
Love is one of the bravest traits you can have.
Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.
Love is like a pair of socks. You gotta have two and they gotta match.
If i had a penny for everytime i found myself thinking of you; I would be rich.
I would rather go on hearing your lies than to go on living without you.
Don’t look now but there’s one too many in this room and I think it’s you. Cute Love Quotes
If there ever comes a day when we can’t be together, keep me in your heart, I’ll stay there forever.
Don’t marry the person you think you can live with. Marry only the individual you think you can’t live without.
My point is that when you fall in love it’s with a real person with flaws. Not with a perfect character from a fairy tale.
A day without you is like a day without sunshine. I’m thinking of you.
Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.
You have been a source of strength and support for me. I’m glad that you’re a part of my life.
For glory gives herself only to those who have always dreamed of her.
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth.
Don’t threaten me with love, baby. Let’s just go walking in the rain.

Love Sayings


When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth.
You may not be the brightest crayon in the box but you’re still my favorite color.
When I find myself thinking of you, it is all the good memories that we had that bring a smile to my face.
For every step that you take in your life, remember, I’m right behind you, always there with you.
Don’t take me as a fool its because of love an trust i have for you that make me to behave like a fool for you.
Before i met you i never knew what it was like — to look at someone and smile for no reason.
You are the sun in my day, the wind in my sky, the waves in my ocean and the beat in my heart… I am thinking of you.
Nobody loves a woman because she is handsome or ugly, stupid or intelligent. We love because we love.
Man, listen.. you don’t love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her.
Love is a game two people can play. You can both win and you can both lose your heart.
To the world you might be one person. But to one person you might be the world.
It is better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.
Love is a canvas furnished by nature and embroidered by imagination.
With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
Love is not a weakness. It is strong. Only the sacrament of marriage can contain it.
Love is not finding someone to live with. It is finding someone you can’t live without.
Love is the irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly.
If I had roses for every time I thought of you, I’d be picking roses for a lifetime.
Other men see angles but I have seen thee and thou art enough.
Let’s commit the perfect crime. I’ll steal your heart and you’ll steal mine.
There are only two times I want to be with you…Now and forever.
I miss you a little, I guess you could say. A little too much, a little too often. A little more each day.
Sometimes I wonder if love is worth fighting for. Then I think of you, and I am ready for war.
Everyone has their own reason for waking up in the morning. Mine is you.
If it is wrong to love you, then my heart just won’t let me be right
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
In your absence, my heart grows stronger. In your presence, I fall in love again.
Love is waiting behind every corner.
I love it when my heart smiles but when it does, it smiles because of you.
Life is the flower and love is the honey.
Loving is not just looking at each other. It is looking in the same direction.
At the touch of love, everyone is a poet.
There’s a difference between beauty and charm. A beautiful woman is one I notice. A charming woman is one who notices me.
A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea.
If you love someone put their name in a circle not a heart. A heart can break but a circle goes on forever.
Love is when you’re having the worst day, but when you look at them all the pain goes away.
Just the thought of being with you tomorrow is enough to get me through the day.
You have to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince.
A man wants a woman to be his first love. A woman wants a man to be her last.
Sitting next to you doing absolutely nothing means absolutely everything to me.
I love you not because I need you. I need you because I love you.
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.

http://www.quotesfrenzy.com/cute-love-quotes-and-sayings

Cute love story


A cute love story with happy ending:
One day somebody proposed u!
U said: "i am Not interested."
This way, somebody lived a happy life .

Dress As Madame Vadima With 6 Items From Your Mom’s Closet

Halloween is getting closer and closer!  Today we have another great KingsIsle costume idea for you crafty Pirates.  Dress up as Madame Vadima this Halloween with these great ideas.
She gazes into her crystal ball and tells you what fortune lies ahead of you. She is mysterious and lovely, and her predictions, while confusing, always come true. You have long admired the flowing hair and colorful costume of Madame Vadima, the mystifying fortune teller on Pirate 101, and now you can dress like her. Here are six things you can pull out of your mom’s closet to dress like Madame Vadima.


Top – Check to see if your mom has a white top that is full and flowing. Try to find one that has a stretchy neckline so you can wear it off your shoulders – just like Madame Vadima!
Skirts – Madame Vadima wears a couple of skirts that are layered. In order to dress like her, you will need to do the same. Raid you mom’s closet and find a couple of long and flowing skirts. Bonus points if any of these are green! You will need another, lighter, shorter skirt to put over it – you want the green to show.
Make-Up – Your mom’s make up will be one of the most fun parts of dressing like Madame Vadima. Have your mom help you use dark eye shadow and eyeliner along with a dark purple lipstick to look just like the mysterious fortune teller.
Scarf – Truly get in the character of a fortune-teller with a scarf around your head, just the way Madame Vadima wears hers. You can also tie another one around your waist as a long, flowing sash.
Boots – One of the most important parts of Madame Vadima’s outfit is her heeled black pair of boots. If the boots you find are too big, stuff some socks in the toes and wear a pair of thick socks so they don’t slip too much.

More Funny People Jokes



Six Items Madam?

Ranjit was in the express lane at his local Wal-Mart supermarket quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of him had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries.
Can you imagine Ranjit's delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward, looked into the cart, and asked her sweetly which six items she would like to buy?
Wouldn't it be great, thought Ranjit, Will and Guy, if that happened more often?

How To Get A Table In A Crowded Restaurant

The Harbour Lights Restaurant, Portsmouth, England, was extremely busy last Saturday evening and they had no free tables.
My elderly neighbours, Ronnie and Sylvie Hartson, were told there would be, at least, an 1 ½ hours wait to be seated.
'Young man,' explained Ronnie patiently, looking at Sylvie with a twinkle in his eye, 'we're both 93 years old and we may not have 45 minutes.'
The ma�tre d' seated Ronnie and Sylvie immediately!

Person with Funny Name Commits 50 Offences

Police in the Republic of Ireland, the Garda, have been chasing a mysterious and impossible to find Polish driver who has apparently committed more than 50 motoring offences.
Officers had been puzzled how the mysterious "Prawo Jazdy" had always produced his documents, but each time with a different address.
They have now discovered the embarrassing truth. Will and Guy's friend, Kinga Sadkowska, from Sopot, Poland, has told us that "Prawo Jazdy" is Polish for "driving licence" and is printed on all Polish licences.
We are delighted to be able to report this hilarious story.

Finally: 'Stop That Laughing.'

...(videoG2)
Gary Saunders, a motorist from Liverpool, England, was stopped by a traffic police officer and reprimanded for laughing at the wheel of his car. He was using a hands-free 'phone when he burst out laughing at a joke told him by his brother-in-law.
A few moments later he noticed a traffic officer flashing his lights at him and gesticulating at him to stop his Renault. When Mr Saunders got out of his car, the policeman castigated him, 'Laughing while driving a car can be an offence.'
'I couldn't believe it when he told me I'd been pulled over for laughing,' Mr Saunders is reported as saying, 'I was driving very safely in the Birkenhead Tunnel and took a call. He said something funny and I was laughing; simple as that. I never took my eyes off the road and was in full control of the car. I definitely wasn't speeding so I asked what the problem was and he told me I was laughing too much.'
Will and Guy also laughed at this story and we have discovered since that Mr Saunders has not been prosecuted - just told off.

A Different Slant on Funny Stories and Jokes About People

Funny Fainting Fit

Simon had fainted. When the paramedics arrived they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint.
'It was enough to make anybody faint,' he spluttered. 'My son, Rod, asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the lawn mower.'

Amusing Marriage Lines

A Good Read?
'Andy, for heaven's sake, why can't you just talk to me once in awhile?' whines his wife, Sonia.
'Huh?' Andy responds.
'Look around you,' Sonia yells as she points around the room. 'All these books. Your head is always buried in books. You don't even know I'm alive!'
'Oh. I'm sorry,' mutters Andy.
'You know, sometimes I wish I were a book. Then you'd at least look at me,' explodes Sonia.
'Hmmm,' Andy mumbles deep in thought, ' then at least I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting.'

Some Hilarious, Short and Jocular Stories


Desperate Bridegroom Needed Money For Wedding

A desperate bridegroom faces jail, not a reception and honeymoon, as his reward for staging four bank robberies after his fiancée's plans for a huge white wedding got out of hand. His "bride to be" demanded a reception with 500 guests, a Chanel wedding gown, a new car for the drive to the service and a Caribbean honeymoon.
The poor man was unable to provide the money for these jollities so he stole some £300,000 [$ 4,228,210 USD] in bank robberies throughout Austria before he was caught when an off duty policeman grabbed him as he fled from a bank in Vienna.
'The wedding was costing a lot of money and I realised I would never be able to pay for it,' he told the court. 'The money from the first robbery went in a day so I just kept going.'

Help Police - Find Me A Husband!


Eventually and unsurprisingly two police officers finally visited her home in Berlin, Germany and confiscated the battery from her mobile phone.
Divorcee, Angela Stahl, aged 44, a desperate housewife, has been reported for wasting police time in Germany after dialling 999 more than one hundred times in the hope of finding a new husband. We have learned that she plagued the emergency line with endless calls claiming she couldn't afford dating agencies.
There is nothing so funny as real life say Will and Guy.

TV Licence Demand Sent To 16th Century Mathematician

A German mathematician who died 450 years ago has been sent a letter demanding that he pay for a TV licence. Algebra expert, Adam Ries, who bought the property in 1525 was sent the bill in Germany.
'We received a letter saying "To Mr Adam Ries" on it, with the request to pay his television and radio fees,' said Annegret Muench, who now heads a club honouring the mathematician, which uses the house as its HQ. Miss Muench returned the letter to the GEZ with a note explaining the request had come too late, as Ries had died in 1559, but she still received a reminder a few weeks later.
This was not the first time the GEZ had sent a bill to those in the afterlife. Last year, a school named after the poet Friedrich Schiller, who died in 1805, received a reminder asking him to declare all radios and televisions in his home and pay the corresponding fees.
Will and Guy say, 'Don't you just love these stories?'

Picking Lemons Is Easy

Sally Winters wanted to earn some money so she applied for a post in a Florida lemon grove which seemed eminently suitable but Sally was concerned that she might be over qualified for the job.
'Look Miss Winters,' said Archie, the foreman, seriously 'have you any actual experience in picking lemons?' 'Well, as a matter of fact, yes,' came Sally's reply and she added confidently, 'I've been divorced three times.' 

Funny short stories : CHECKOUT LADY






MAN: I'd like to buy some dog food.
CHECKOUT LADY: Do you have a dog?
MAN: Yes.
CHECKOUT LADY: Where is he?
MAN: He's at home.
CHECKOUT LADY: I'm sorry, I can't sell this dog food to you unless I see the dog. Store policy.
The next day, the man returns.
MAN: I'd like to buy some cat food.
CHECKOUT LADY: Do you have a cat?
MAN: Yes.
CHECKOUT LADY: Well...where is she?
MAN: She's at home! 
CHECKOUT LADY: Sorry, I can't sell this cat food to you unless I see your cat.
The next day the man returns.
CHECKOUT LADY: What's in the sack?
MAN: Put your hand inside. 
CHECKOUT LADY: Hmmm...It's warm and moist! What is it?
MAN: I would like to buy some toilet paper .

Who is clever? Teacher or student?



One Night 4 College Students Were Playing Till Late Night And Didn't Study For The Test Which Was Scheduled For The Next Day. 


In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as Dirty and weird with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and Said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return The tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way Back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test. 


So the Dean said they can have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked Him and said they will be ready by that time. On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, All four were required to sit in Separate classrooms for the test. 




They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days. 




The Test consisted of 2 questions with the total of 100 Marks. 




Q.1. Your ****........................( 2 MARKS ) 




Q.2. Which tire burst?...............( 98 MARKS ) 




A) Front Left 




B) Front Right 




C) Back Left 




D) Back Right ........!!!. 


True story



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